Getting told off by someone who is homeless, who you're trying to help, is a sobering experience. I witnessed this in Philadelphia and I was reminded of it yesterday in San Francisco. I was on Filmore St, I'd come here for a haircut at a place I'd found on google. Compared to the streets I had been to earlier in the day Filmore St was a lot more relaxed. It was nice to see children out with their parents, people sitting outside bars laughing. Nice cars, nice people, warmth, a good atmosphere. I went into the barbers and sat down to wait my turn. On the seat was a copy of a paper like the Big Issue we have at home, sold by homeless people to earn them some money - personally. I felt very fortunate at that moment to be sat in a barbers, with enough money for a haircut, in a nice area - feeling unchallenged and relaxed. I had bought this same paper from an elderly lady whilst I was in Philadelphia, who I had then seen shouting at a young man who was trying to help her. This is what I wrote at the time.
As I walked up the steps from the subway I spotted what I can only describe as a tiny old lady, wrapped up in blankets, offering a newspaper for sale. The papers were one dollar and a way for homeless people to earn some money, like the Big Issue in the UK, but the quality was not as good, it was much cheaper at around 60p. A young man had stopped next to her and was stooped down, taking something out of his backpack. 'Here' he said to her, 'put it on'. It was a thick red jumper and it looked like a good one. He was smart-casually dressed and looked as though he had the means to look after himself. 'Here put it on, put it on' he kept pressing her. The old lady looked reluctant, maybe red wasn't her colour. Eventually she took the jumper. The day was bitterly cold and you could easily see the motivation for the young man's generosity. 'There you go' he said and he walked away. Suddenly the lady started shouting at him; 'I don't want your shit' she said 'take your shit away' and she threw the jumper at him, it landed on the sidewalk. Of course, this was unexpected. The young man picked it up, looked at me, looked at the lady, held up his arms, smiled in disbelief and walked away with his jumper. She didn't give up 'I don't want your shit, I don't want to be f....n homeless, don't give me your shit you bastard'. Now she was being abusive. It would be easy to think of her as ill, disturbed, she certainly looked the part. And maybe that is what the young man concluded - that you just can't help some people. But maybe there was something else going on here. People can look undignified, but that doesn't mean that dignity is unimportant to them. I have many a time been told 'I don't need charity' by people who clearly do need charity - in the deep sense, like we all do. What they mean is that they don't want handouts, they would much prefer to earn it. This lady was doing her best to earn it, with probably some considerable effort on her part, she had got herself some newspapers and was selling them. The last thing she needed was someone telling her job wasn't a good enough job - she was not looking for pity, she was looking for respect. What she wanted was for people to buy her newspaper, because that gave her recognition, meaning, it meant that people 'saw' her.
Yesterday I was grateful for her.
As I walked up the steps from the subway I spotted what I can only describe as a tiny old lady, wrapped up in blankets, offering a newspaper for sale. The papers were one dollar and a way for homeless people to earn some money, like the Big Issue in the UK, but the quality was not as good, it was much cheaper at around 60p. A young man had stopped next to her and was stooped down, taking something out of his backpack. 'Here' he said to her, 'put it on'. It was a thick red jumper and it looked like a good one. He was smart-casually dressed and looked as though he had the means to look after himself. 'Here put it on, put it on' he kept pressing her. The old lady looked reluctant, maybe red wasn't her colour. Eventually she took the jumper. The day was bitterly cold and you could easily see the motivation for the young man's generosity. 'There you go' he said and he walked away. Suddenly the lady started shouting at him; 'I don't want your shit' she said 'take your shit away' and she threw the jumper at him, it landed on the sidewalk. Of course, this was unexpected. The young man picked it up, looked at me, looked at the lady, held up his arms, smiled in disbelief and walked away with his jumper. She didn't give up 'I don't want your shit, I don't want to be f....n homeless, don't give me your shit you bastard'. Now she was being abusive. It would be easy to think of her as ill, disturbed, she certainly looked the part. And maybe that is what the young man concluded - that you just can't help some people. But maybe there was something else going on here. People can look undignified, but that doesn't mean that dignity is unimportant to them. I have many a time been told 'I don't need charity' by people who clearly do need charity - in the deep sense, like we all do. What they mean is that they don't want handouts, they would much prefer to earn it. This lady was doing her best to earn it, with probably some considerable effort on her part, she had got herself some newspapers and was selling them. The last thing she needed was someone telling her job wasn't a good enough job - she was not looking for pity, she was looking for respect. What she wanted was for people to buy her newspaper, because that gave her recognition, meaning, it meant that people 'saw' her.
Yesterday I was grateful for her.